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Comments by The Cynic

I have this vision...
It's October 9th, 2003, and civilian Al Gore, Jr. is holding yet another press conference. He announces that he has found one more vote to add to his 
total in Florida. It turns out that Elsie Carmichael had chronic diarrhea on November 7, 2000, and had every intention of voting for him:

Gore: "With this single vote, my lead over Governor Bush should be 14, and    not the 537 deficit that the partisan Katherine Harris certified. More people wanted me to win. Here we have Ms. Carmichael, who wanted to vote for me and she is struggling to pay for her prescription medicine right now. The problem was, she ate at a Cuban restaurant the night prior to the election.

"We all know the political slant of the Cuban community. They blocked her 
from voting for me. This was a Republican restaurant, they saw her and they 
decided that they could not allow her to vote. She has been disenfranchised. 
This is America. In America every vote has to count. I will now take a few 

2. Cynical Observations...

OK, I've now counted 15 columns I have written about this election. That's enough. I can't keep writing about it. I'm sick of writing about it. I should be writing about pop up ads and government waste. This will be my last column about this stupid extended election. I will not write one more word about...Oh wait, I just had another column idea....forget what I said.

Many of you are aware of the arrest of Robert Downey Jr. for drug
possession. Normally, when an actor or celebrity keeps getting caught in this trap, I find myself saying, "Got what you deserved, you loser." Downey is somehow different, and I'm not sure why. I wish him well in recovery and I hope this time he stays off the stuff.


                   'Til next time...


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The Cynic is the pseudonym of one of America's most-trusted indivuals.  Read more at
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